Alex and the Dinner Swap

Hey everyone! This week’s story is early, because I’m going to Hawaii 8). Which means next week’s will be late.


After I moved to California and decided to start dating again, I had a very successful process in place. I was going on fewer dates with more quality people, for the most part. I was bending my standards less, not willing to compromise. But sometimes I still gave people too much of the benefit of the doubt.

Alex (which is not his real name because I honestly don’t remember) was one of my first dates in California. I think he had two pictures on his dating profile, which was kinda of sketchy, so after talking for a bit I asked for his social media. He said he didn’t have any, which was double sketchy, but he agreed with my reservations and sent another picture via text. It was unfortunately just as small and low resolution as the other photos he had provided. Not a good sign.

I decided to go out with him anyways because I’m not THAT shallow, and he was a small business owner so he sounded like he had his life together.

I decided to meet him at a mid-priced Italian restaurant after work one night, and as expected, he definitely did not look like his pictures. I had come prepared for that, since they were obscured at flattering angles. He also had balding, ridiculously greasy curly hair. I couldn’t tell if it was product or not, but it was still kind of gross.

While we were ordering dinner, I was having trouble deciding between two dishes: a cream based gnocchi and a tomato based pasta. “How about you get one, I’ll get the other, and we can share a few bites,” he suggested. I love being able to try a little of everything, so I agreed, happy that he was open to sharing.

The conversation before dinner arrived was kind of boring. He was socially awkward, and I quickly realized that his small business wasn’t really… a business? He was just another one of those people that bought something that wasn’t his and resold it. In his case, clothing. I was growing more unimpressed by the second.

Finally dinner came, and I was happy to dive into my gnocchi, which was really delicious. Partway into the meal, he suggested it was time to try each others meals. I was about to reach over to grab a forkful of the pasta on his plate.

Instead, he grabbed my plate and swapped it with his.

I am a very food possessive person. This was NOT OKAY. I agreed to swap a few bites, not the entire dish. Especially since he was mildly repulsive, my plan was to take a bite off the side he didn’t eat from, but that was impossible with a plate swap.

I watched in horror as he swallowed the rest of my delicious meal. I had one bite of his and it wasn’t remotely as good. But I had no wish to finish his dinner, either. He had eaten the majority of both dishes.

When I clearly wasn’t going to finish the plate in front of me, he grabbed it back and ate that too.

I did not offer to pay when the bill came.

In the parking lot afterwards, he asked if he was going to see me again.

I was so annoyed, I went off on him. He only partially deserved it because he was generally pleasant besides the food swap thing, but I take serious offense when someone messes with my food.

“Why do men always ask that? Does anyone really ever say no? You force women to lie to your face, because women get murdered for saying no, then you bad mouth them later when they disappear. NEVER ask that question at the end of a date.”

He sheepishly walked back to his car, but still sounded hopeful that I was going to contact him again for some reason. We never spoke again.

Has anyone ever done this to you? This was the first time it’s ever happened to me. Let me know in the comments!

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